Whats up with the name??

Once i heard 'Upside Down Pickle in a Jar' as a metaphor for a baby in a womb, and thought it was pretty fitting for our blog. This is for all the family and friends that Ben and I unfortunately dont get to speak to often. You can feel like you are here in all the action!

Friday, December 23, 2011

You're Welcome.

This blog post is completely pointless. I'm really just bored and waiting on Ben to get home from work. So if you like my ramblings in previous posts thus far...keep reading. It you could care less about what makes my mind tick, or are easily offended, then stop. Talk to you later homeskillet.
This weekend is Christmas. And after this weekend, I am booked for every weekend until the cutoff date. The cutoff date is a specific date where no more plans are made. It's halfway through February. There will be no plans made with anyone in advance: if you wanna hang out, it will solely depend on how I feel. So needless to say, I have quite a few things to get done before CD-cutoff date.
It all starts with the first weekend in January. The nursery plans will still be being executed, and it will be Avery's 18th birthday. I don't want to make any other plans than to do stuff around my house and celebrate with my family.
The second weekend in January we have an ultrasound. It's on the 14th. There's a place in Tallahassee that specializes in 4D ultrasounds, so as a Christmas gift to my family, we are taking Mom, Dad, Avery, Grandma and Grandaddy. Apparently theres like a big screen and couches and we get everything on DVD and a few picture printouts. We're excited about it, but mostly excited for them. When Grandma and Mom had babies, there were no 4D ultrasounds, and I've never seen one live, so it's going to be cool. Then the rest of the weekend will be spent still getting things ready. I know I will be putting this on every weekend, but that just shows how much we haven't done. and maybe it will motivate me to do more in the nursery tonight when I'm done entertaining you readers!
Every weekend after that I have either a shower, or a family birthday, including Ben's. So I have alot to cram into  two months starting this weekend. I absolutely refuse to make plans after the CD, to ensure that I'm stress free and relaxing before the big day!

I'm a planner.
That's just something I have to do. I make lists after lists of things, and rewrite lists because I like to. I've probably killed at least 5 trees so far with baby related lists. So the fact that I know everything that I have planned out in memory isn't weird. It's normal.
Along with the plans for the months leading up to birth, I have plans for the hospital, hospital stay, and our coming home.
And because I feel like restating my plans, i will include them in my blog.

I'm just gonna say that I don't give two craps about anyone but Myself, Ben, and Finn during the hospital scene, but mostly me.  Before you decide to hate me, or hate me more, let me explain.

First off, I am going to be the person that haunts dreams if I don't get what I want as far as a general plan goes. I know these plans can and probably will change, due to natural occurrences, but it's better to have something in mind than nothing. So when you get to a ridiculous part, like the one about having a pony ride outside the hospital, just keep on reading.
LABOR-When I go into labor at home, or work, or wherever I am, I am telling Ben and Mom right away. Those are the people who I want to help me in case something goes wrong or I just need help if I'm by myself. I'm not going to be rushing to the hospital right away until the contractions are at that distance apart that says I have to. I, if able, want to be sure everything is packed, and I possibly shower, and someone puts fresh sheets on my bed, feeds jasper, and all that last minute stuff. then when I go to the hospital, I want it to be Me and Ben only. And I want it to be that way until a little before I go into active labor. I need that time with Ben alone. We will then notify Team Finn. When Team Finn (Dad, Mom, and Avery) get there, then Ben can watch all the ooey gooey fun of birth...while I have my support system near me.
When I am laboring, which I understand to be HORRIBLE, it is all about me. Nobody else in that room is having contractions. Nobody else in that room will be having back pain. Nobody else in that room (except Mom) has experienced, or is about to experience an excruciating destruction of her woman parts. So actually I don't even want anyone else trying to comfort me by saying, "I know it hurts", or "It's gonna be ok" except mom. So since I am planning on making this situation an uncensored one, I have chosen people that have seen me at my worst already. Mom, Dad, Avery, and Ben have seen me at my stomach-bug, and drunken-night-sickest and emotionally worst in my life, so that's nothing new to them. That's why I chose them. I will feel like I have nothing to hide and feel ashamed about. So say I poop during pregnancy, first they'll gag, then they'll make jokes. And when I get mad and threaten them with whatever, they'll brush it off. I want the delivery room to be an environment where I feel comfortable, because honestly, It's all about me at that point. Now I understand that things don't always go as planned, so If for some reason I have to have a C-section, the plan stays the same. But hopefully i wont have to have one.
When Finn comes out, it switches to Ben and Finn and I. Because all the nights we talked to him and wondered what he looked like and how we couldn't wait to hold him, will be a reality. He's something that we made out of our love for each other. This is going to be my favorite part!

When Finn and I get cleaned up and moved to a room, I have to have time with my 3 person family. I don't know how much time it will be. Could be 3 hours, could be the first 24 hours. Whatever we feel comfortable with. Also because I don't want to worry about the way I look or worrying about someone visiting while I'm attempting breastfeeding. So when we decide we are ready for visitors, we will call them or send them a text. I think that's going to be cool because up until that point, nobody is even going to know that we had him, till they get a picture message of his sweet face saying come meet me! A total surprise. Hospital visits to Ben and Finn and I are strictly invitation only. invitation by text, that is. You know who you are ; )

Coming home and the first few weeks that follow are kind of the same. Many people have offered to help me when we come home and I really appreciate them, and will definitely take them up on their offers when I'm ready. I feel comfortable with a handful of people helping me out those first few days, but everyone else: There will be a sign on my front door that reads something like "you knock, you die."
kidding. kind of. No, It will say something about how we are sleeping and spending time with our baby boy, blah blah, please do not disturb. And If  you weren't invited over, or we haven't made a plan for you to come help or drop something off, and you knock on the door, prepare to feel like poo. Because that's how I'm gonna make you feel. Worst case scenario, I am going to feel like my girl parts are dying, and I'm going to have a screaming baby, and I don't want anyone over to see me or Finn like that. Best case scenario, I feel adequate and Finn is a great baby. In that case, I will probably be sleeping and still wont want to see you. So that's why I have a phone, and unless you talk to Me, you aren't coming in my house.
I know it's a little extreme, buttttt, I have never been a Mom before. I may really suck at it. I may get stressed out and break down a few times, and I may have postpartum depression, who knows? If I need help, believe you me, I will ask for it. Anyway, to build Finn's immunity and also to let us learn how to be a family,and attempt at establishing a routine,  no visitors will be allowed unless we ask for them. And because I don't want to feel like I have to entertain guests while they hold him. Then, after we feel comfortable with ourselves, we plan on having a meet the baby day.
We will invite extended family and our good friends to meet and pass around Finn. That is going to be a great day, because by then I will have a gazillion pictures on facebook, sorry FB friends, and everyone will be real excited to hold him and stuff.
******Mental note to myself- include those invites with the birth announcements.*******

Speaking of birth announcements, I am going to attempt to design my own! I have a general idea, but I haven't actually tried to make one yet. I am also making my thank you notes. If you know me, then you know it involves a birds nest and his initials. (no I didn't put his initials in a nest...)

Well, I hope I bored you to death here with this post. you're welcome.

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